Exploring the Science of Happiness with Pooja Bedi

Exploring the Science of Happiness with Pooja Bedi

Exploring the Science of Happiness with Pooja Bedi

Last updated:8th May, 2018

“If you want something in life, the whole Universe conspires for you to get it.”

 This is no secret. I have talked about this several times in my posts because this is something I truly believe in. It has worked out for me in the past and it is something I feel is the basis of my whole life- past, present and future.

It is common, however, to lose out on faith and hope when things are not going the way you would want them to.  Right then when a vivacious, dynamic and a charming former Bollywood actress confirms that there is a power in your dreams and it is your dreams that create your future, you know you’ve got it right.

I am here talking about Pooja Bedi, Founder of Happy Souls, who recently conducted a workshop on ‘Transformation of Inner-Self’. Organized by FICCI-FLO (Ludhiana Chapter), it was an amazing experience to explore the ‘SCIENCE OF HAPPINESS’ with this woman of substance and a happy soul.

In case you are thinking that I got fascinated by the celebrity element that was involved in the event, let me tell you I was not.

What, however, garnered my attention and interest was her sincerity, power of conviction, and the belief she had in her dreams. There was something unusual in her that wanted me to know more about her, the work she does and how she finds it so easy to radiate so much of powerful energy and positive vibes.

The reason I am writing this post is to share short snippets of powerful lessons I learned from her:

Exploring the Science of Happiness with Pooja Bedi

Want it. Visualize it. Manifest it.

She had the courage to give up everything and start from a scratch when she asked for a divorce from her former husband. She indeed managed it so well. She could do it because she wanted to build a life of happiness and love around her and because there was a belief. It was a life she could visualize for herself and she had the power to create one.

“The success of a relationship is not hanging in there for another 50 years trying to avoid ‘DIVORCE’. Instead, success is to walk away from it knowing that you are not happy in your marriage and develop such a bond with your ex that you can dance at his next marriage.”

-Pooja Bedi

Read Also: Is Women Entrepreneurship Only About Underprivileged Women?   

It’s about being who you are

There is a lot more to this award-winning relationship columnist. She had the vision and she had the heart to maintain a cordial and flourishing relationship with a man who had left her broke.

It is, therefore, not about giving back all the time. Instead, happiness in life is about doing things that reflect who you are and the substance that you are made of and not about falling to someone else’s standards.

Apologize. Forgive. Rebuild.

We all make mistakes. It’s common to miss opportunities. And it’s alright to fail sometimes in life. You need to let go off the past and forgive yourself. You need to apologize to your own self and start loving yourself all over again. When it’s all clear inside, it’s time to start building the things once again and your whole new life.

Is Women Entrepreneurship Only About Underprivileged Women?   

Is Women Entrepreneurship Only About Underprivileged Women?   

Women Entrepreneurship

Last updated:1st May, 2018

As a part of my work, I have been recently involved in a few projects related to women entrepreneurship.

Being an entrepreneur is a trending fad. Given how much sensitive the topic of ‘women empowerment’ is to masses, attempts are being made to foray women into the roles of entrepreneurship. The reasons are obvious. It would give them more freedom, financial independence, help them make autonomous decisions and thus, make them empowered.

Is Women Entrepreneurship Only About Underprivileged Women?

The work is amazing- you get a chance to give it back to society and I am always in for this kind of work. In fact, I am willing to contribute in whatever way possible to make this happen. Something that disappoints me, however, is that whenever we talk of women entrepreneurship, we automatically start believing that it’s about unleashing the powerful entrepreneurial force of only underprivileged or below poverty line strata of women population. Really?

From where I see, I find hundreds and thousands of women belonging to affluent families trapped into a system of living that is cruel, sadistic, and inhumane and something that is not acceptable, at least to me.  Why?

While there are a few who are complacent with things as they are in their lives, there are many who are forced to bear this because they are not financially independent. A woman living with a man whom she doesn’t love but has kids to be taken care of, a daughter-in-law who is made to suffer every day because she is dependent and a girl who wants to fly but has been caged-I look around and I feel every such woman needs empowerment more than anyone else.  In no manner, it means I am against working for underprivileged. I only wish there was a balance in the efforts we make.

Read Also: Life Lessons to Be Learned From Sridevi’s Life

According to me, the ultimate path to ‘Empowerment’ is through gaining financial independence and the ability to generate money. When we talk of women in our country, there is a need for almost every woman to master this skill regardless of her family income. It doesn’t surprise me that only 14% of businesses in India are run by female entrepreneurs, as reported by Sixth Economic Census.

And from where I see, all these women who are made to suppress their dreams and desires have so many hidden qualities and unpolished skills that if given a right platform they can nurture themselves into highly successful entrepreneurs. As a result, they will no longer have to depend on others for their needs or desires.

Believe me, one such empowered woman comes with a potential to transform the lives of several other women lacking funds and resources. Therefore, I strongly believe you can get powerful and amazing results by starting with women in your vicinity. You don’t necessarily have to wait until you visit some organizations, NGO’s or ashrams to find women who would allow you to transform their lives.

Finally, it’s just about making a difference in someone’s life and that could be anyone. Honestly, really anyone and maybe the person right next to you. It’s time to stop waiting and start acting.

Image source: citytoday.news

How Taking a Step Back in My Career Helped Propel it Forward

How Taking a Step Back in My Career Helped Propel it Forward

Step Back in My Career

Last updated:2nd April, 2018

The starting years of my career were spent as a lecturer, part-time faculty member and as an assignment writer. Teaching has always been one of my passions but somehow I wasn’t happy in these job roles. More than happiness, I found my jobs were not fulfilling to the extent I wanted them to be. I always wanted to do something big and something better.

The indomitable willpower and the strong desire of doing something better made me constantly search for better options. One fine day, I came across the opportunity of contributing articles as a freelancer to one of the leading career portals of the UK. It was interesting and something I hadn’t done before. I couldn’t let it go and thus, grabbed it right away. This freelancing gig exposed me to the world of Blogging and Social Media Marketing. Certainly, I found the field to be interesting but there were a lot of inhibitions as a fresher in the industry. Many times, I thought of listening to my heart and taking Blogging as a full-time career. My brain would, however, guide me otherwise. I decided to go with something that is considered to be more rational. All this while, I did nothing better than contributing articles as a freelancer. The opportunity lasted for good one year and after it got over I was back to square one- left with a job role of an assignment writer. It helped me earn money but it was one of those few things I never enjoyed doing in life.

I was downright miserable. I had to struggle a lot. Several business plans were made and destroyed. After months of muddling through, I woke up to a radical idea: Maybe it was time to launch my own Blog and quit assignment writing.

Today, I look back to realize that the space I got after my stint as a freelancer got over and the time I spent on exploring other business models made me confident of doing something that was close to my heart but I was not expert at doing- writing and lots of writing. It made me closer to the realization that there lay a lot of potential in the experience I had gained as a freelance blogger considering Blogging was relatively a new concept to people where I lived and everyone around me was slowly catching up to the idea of Digital Marketing. This could open a whole array of new and exciting opportunities for me if I could market myself right.

To start off, it demanded that I launch my own blog. Having known that the growth of a blog was something that was primarily dependent on how far I could go in connecting my readers on an emotional ground, it was not an easy job. There were too many things to be figured out- for how long I could survive without a paid gig, should I focus on writing the content only my blog or other websites as well, what are the things I should be doing to enhance my online visibility?

I decided to give myself 1 year before I would again switch onto something that would pay me financially, howsoever, less it would be. This meant dedicating 365 days of my life to Blogging, learning new things and building a list of readers. It was not that simple though.

I don’t want to downplay how scary the choice was. There’s no way I could’ve done it without a supportive husband and a bunch of loyal readers. Getting the support and positive feedback from friends and family from day one made me feel I was lucky to be in that situation. Not to mention, walking away from the money assignment writing would give me was really disorienting.

‘Will I ever get to where I have always wanted to be in my career?’

I remember asking this question to my own self and people close to me at least a hundred times, if not more. There were days I felt crazy about what I was doing.

I still don’t know if it was just luck or a bit of my good work that landed me my first big project within a time span of six months only- much before I had projected the results to pour in. I didn’t stop myself there. Instead, I started diversifying my work and kept challenging myself every time there was a new thing to learn.

Read Also: How to Stay Productive When Working From Home

With each new project that came my way, I became stronger and confident. I found myself dreaming-something I had stopped doing after high school. I have always felt dreams are powerful and those who know me would know how important my dreams are to me. They have given me a reason strong enough to live my life.

The fact is that the moment I decided to step back from what was helping me make money (but not something I was enjoying), my life changed all over. It made me understand how important it was to pursue a passion in your life. Sometimes it is only when you pause, things start taking a shape and you learn to embrace a change.

I dedicated myself completely to my blog and every single project that came my way. I never allowed myself to leave an opportunity unexplored. The result is, today, I am spearheading several projects, planning new things almost every day and working with clients all over the world.

Dare to dream and your dreams will take you to places where you’ve never been before!

Image source: beleaderly.com

 

 

 

Life Lessons: Creating a Blueprint for your Life

Life Lessons: Creating a Blueprint for your Life

blueprint

Last updated:30th January, 2018

There are some special moments or occasions in life when you come across people who inspire you a lot and leave their mark on you.

There is something about them that fascinates you and motivates you to be like them. You get a feeling that it is actually they who know what you should be doing to make your life worth living.

I talked to a few such people (both men and women) who are an epitome of love, life and success to create a blueprint for a life so that each one of you can stop making those mistakes which you have been doing till date and start managing your lives the way you should be.

The given blueprint starts right when you are in school and extends until the time you hit your retirement age:

1. School is just not about homework

You must not spend all your time, effort and energy in getting better grades during your school days. Remember, school is not a harbinger of success or happiness in life. There is a lot more for you to focus on during these formative years of your life. Participate in sports and engage yourself in other activities. Strive hard to gain competitive skills as they will motivate you to give your best shot always.

2. Don’t wait to go to grad school

If you wish to do MBA or go for masters in any other program, there is no reason you should stop yourself from doing so. The jobs can wait but you might never get a chance to go back to school later in life. This, however, completely depends on the career plan you have drafted for yourself.  The only point is that you must not leave a stone unturned in accomplishing your dreams because unfulfilled dreams create a permanent vacuum in your life.

3. Guard your marriage

Firstly, do everything that it takes to marry the love of your life. Never let your love walk away from you. And, when you are married you must guard your marriage and thrive on keeping your family together. It is because divorce is not socially acceptable and it is something that can permanently ruin the lives of kids. Thus, if you love your kids, you must stay married to their parent. For this to happen, it is not someone else but you who have to take the responsibility on your shoulders.

4. Become a Minimalist

It’s alright sometimes to follow the trend. Practice minimalism and your life will be in better control. By keeping your expenses in control, you will have more professional and personal flexibility.  Furthermore, you’ll be able to spend your time on things that matter more in your life than anything else.

Read Also: Life Lessons: You Always Have a Choice

5. Gather courage to start your own thing

Have you ever thought about starting your own company?

By having your own company, you get abundant control over your life. In case the financial risk scares you, you can think about a funded company.  You may even do this in partnership so that you get the option to work less when it’s time for you to focus more on the family. This, however, certainly applies more to women than men.

6. Don’t let age ruin your happiness

Women as compared to men are more likely to get unhappy as they age. Even if this is true, what you must know is that it is very much possible to change the trajectory of your happiness. This will, however, happen only if you are willing to do things differently and stop living your life on someone else’s terms and conditions. Start by living differently right now when you are young so as not to have any regrets later in life.

Have you made any mistakes in life? Consider sharing them with our readers so that they are careful in not repeating the same mistakes and can, instead, make their life more meaningful.

Image source: programyourmind.org

 

 

The Mystery of Work-Life Balance

The Mystery of Work-Life Balance

Work-Life Balance

Last updated:7th January, 2018

Everyone out there seems to be interested in achieving work-life balance these days. Talk to recruiters and they would tell you millennials value work-life balance to an extent that they are even ready to compromise fancy salary packages that get offered to them. This brings me to a point where I start thinking what is it that constitutes work-life balance?

Work-Life Balance

Work-life balance is something that is unique to every individual. Everyone understands something different by work-life balance. It, therefore, requires a lot of active awareness and conscious choices to create a successful and satisfactory personal and professional life.

In order to find your answers and the true meaning of work-life balance in your life, you need to understand what makes you happy, the things you’re most passionate about and what you can do all day long without getting tired.  Remember, it is all about what you want and what you like. You must not be, therefore, driven by outside influences. Instead, you must strive hard on finding your own path, thereby, not letting any outside influence create any inner conflicts for you.

For example, for a professional mother the work-life balance implies getting sufficient time to devote to her child/ children. For someone else, it might just mean the flexibility of doing the job from any location so as to be able to travel frequently.

Are you still not clear on what will make you feel you have achieved perfect work-life balance in your life? Try answering the simple questions given below and you might just find your answers:

What are your priorities in life?

What is it that you value the most in your life?

Where do you want to see yourself in future?

Where do you want to put your maximum time and attention?

By reflecting on your answers, you’ll be able to understand your true self and what comes first to you. As a result, the choices you make will be more constructive and there will be better utilization of time. When there is clarity of things in your life, you feel there are no inhibitions in saying ‘Yes’ or ‘No’.  As a result, the life automatically starts changing its course towards its betterment and you start feeling much more satisfied.

Read Also: Use of Digital Technologies: Parenting For the Digital Age

Remember, life is majorly about the choices you make. It is the choices you make that determine how much happiness and satisfaction you get in your life. By listening to your inner voice, you can make choices that are capable of directing your life in a positive direction. However, such choices that make us feel better about our lives are not easy to make and stick to. They require courage, willpower and focus in life.

Finally, the change takes place only when you stop making excuses to yourself. Only when you start aligning your time and energy with what you feel is important in your life; you start achieving work-life balance. Even if that means changing your job to make it more suitable for your needs, personality, and lifestyle, you’ve to stand up for that change. It is only by gathering the desired amount of courage and feeling ready to do everything it takes to bring in the change, you start getting closer to living a life that contains a perfect work-life balance.

Image source: trendyfact.com

 

 

Trapping Your Truest Identity: Significance of Your Own Identity

Trapping Your Truest Identity: Significance of Your Own Identity

truest identity

Last updated:11th January, 2018

How, often, in life does it happen that you want to be someone else and wish to run away from your own identity?

It’s a common practice to pursue a different identity the moment we find things are not going fine in your life.

And, this applies to everyone irrespective of one’s age, gender or any other factors.

Even though we start pursuing different identities by moving in new directions, we hardly find happiness in our lives. Those times and areas fail us miserably. We lose hope and find it impossible to feel happy, contented and confident once again.

In the whole process of trying to get through the difficult times, we forget who we are and where we belong to.

The Journey of Trapping My Truest Identity

Before I ventured full-time into blogging, I always knew I wanted to do something big than just pursue blogging as a part-time thing. So, I was constantly on the look-out for some work options that I could pursue considering my circumstances: small town, flexible work environment and preferably something related to IT. I thought of some entrepreneurship roles, made a few business plans as well and the only thing that came out of everything I did was the disappointment.

I wanted to move out for my continuing education and career settlement but couldn’t muster the courage to face the unknown. As a result, I settled in my hometown itself. But something remained missing all the time. What followed was the struggle of deciding what to pursue.

I remember I wasted the most crucial years of my life contemplating what it could be that would bring contentment in my life and doing different things just to keep myself busy and sadness at bay.  The only good thing was that I kept giving my hundred percent into everything I did-small or big.

Today, I look back to realize it was nothing but a side effect of pursuing a different identity- to settle into the life of a homemaker having given up the dreams of becoming an independent working woman.

Read Also: A Path to Self-Discovery: 8 Questions You Must Ask Yourself 

My life was structured in a way that it was in a dire need of a platform that I could use to showcase my skills. To put it in simple words, the life of a full-time working professional in some highly developed town suited me more than anything else. Just because there was a lack of courage to take the right decision at a right time, many years that followed were wasted in chasing the dreams that remained unaccomplished and pursuing identities that hardly reflected my true inner self.

I was, however, lucky that things came back on track and everything changed with my decision, that I took back in 2016, of pursuing blogging full-time. I took the plunge and followed my passion for writing.

“And, when you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it.”

                                                                                                         – Paulo Coelho, The Alchemist

Because I wanted it really bad and due to the unconditional support and love of people around me, I found the true calling of my heart. I found my truest identity. It gave me the chance to be the best I can be and to align with love by doing what I was made to do. It gave me a purpose in my life.

What all I learn from incidents that took place in my life is that you identify the real purpose of your life only by pursuing your truest identity. It gives you the power to own your life, your decisions, and your reactions. Your true identity acts as your guide all the time and it flourishes even when everything else goes wrong. It gives you a chance to live a life with purpose, in times both good and bad.

Finally, if life made it possible for me to pursue my identity, it can be very much possible for you as well.

Image source: wpengine.netdna-cdn.com

How to Make Your Mind Calm And Peaceful Under Pressure?

How to Make Your Mind Calm And Peaceful Under Pressure?

mind calm and peaceful under pressure

Last updated:23rd February, 2018

There’s a lot going on in this world. In fact, there’s a lot going on in each and every individual’s life where there is so much chaos caused due to lack of time and much of doing along with the presence of uncertainties.  In order to protect the mind from getting affected by so much of pressure, there are a number of ways to follow and remain in the state of serenity such as to defeat the panic signals, breathe properly, get things into perspective, avoid negative people and so on.

1. Breathe In, Breathe out…in…out

One of the most effective ways to keep your mind calm and peaceful under pressure is by learning how to breathe properly. Shallow breathing means that the diaphragm muscles are not being used. The process helps to keep the mind calm in a way that the autonomic nervous system is channeled into a more productive activity which will be extremely useful in fighting the panic response. The best way to execute it is by inhaling deeply so that the chest and stomach are filled with air. Then exhale slowly and while doing so concentrate on your breath and continue repeating the mantra that is ‘breathe in’ and ‘breathe out’. We should do 4-8 breathe cycles 1-3 times every day.

2. Positive Thinking

The concept of the power of positive thinking can sometimes feel a little cliché but the physical and mental benefits of positive thinking have been demonstrated by multiple scientific studies. One should think positive as it gives you more confidence, improves your mood, and even reduces the likelihood of developing conditions such as hypertension, depression and other stress-related disorders. As we all know that stress, anxiety, tension, worries, and fears can hurt our health, not only physically but also mentally and emotionally. Positive thinking serves as a medicine to get rid of the negative states and makes us able to perform better in every aspect of life.

3. Get Yourself a Nice Cup of Coffee or Tea

A nice cup of coffee or tea helps to lower the levels of stress hormone cortisol in the blood after a stressful event. Hence, whenever one confronts pressure, the craving for a cup of coffee or tea can work. Caffeine has calming effects because of the way it affects your brain. Such effects are noticeable as the stimulation and energy boost.

A cup of tea or coffee produces euphoria and pleasant feelings. A strong tea probably has around 50mgs of caffeine, so you need to drink roughly double to get the same hit as a cup of coffee. The benefits of having a tea or a coffee are protection against liver disease and cancer, lower risk of type 2 diabetes, immune boosting properties and much more.  Also, you can buy tea or coffee from the nearby market from various well-known brands like Taj Mahal, Nescafe, Tata Tea, etc. else shop for the same online via grocery coupons from Bigbasket, Amazon, Grofers, etc. Plus many brands offer variety in tea or coffee like Green Tea, White Tea, Herbal Tea, Instant coffee, Green coffee, etc. which you can order as per your taste or liking.

4. Meditate the Stress Out

Meditation gives you deep rest. It is an activity in which the practitioner just sits and allows the mind to dissolve. It helps in achieving a mentally clear and emotionally calm state. Meditation relaxes your mind instantly no matter where you are. It will de-stress you, refresh you, and fill you with enthusiasm that you can tap anytime. The benefits of meditation are that it reduces stress, improves concentration, encourages a healthy lifestyle, increases happiness, slows aging and so on. The best way to meditate is by sitting or lying comfortably, closing eyes, breathing naturally and focusing your attention on the breath and how the body moves with each inhalation and exhalation.

Read Also: What to Do When It’s Not Getting Better

5. Plan and Execute

Minds and bodies can become aroused and difficult to calm down. There are situations which are very cumbersome to tackle, over where we need to plan, monitor and execute tasks more effectively. We worry about things because we feel like we’re not fully prepared for them. Mental rehearsal is the way to convince yourself that you are prepared and it melts the worries away. Planning before execution is always beneficiary as it motivates you, provides a safe harbor for possibility thinking, increases your values and hence the execution of the work turns out to be effective. Planning things in mind involve asking the value of different things to yourself, realizing their importance, figuring out how to reach to them, visually seeing yourself achieving those things, seeking guidance from those who have already done what you aim to do.

6. Take a Break and Do What You Like

It’s important to take an occasional break as the brain needs some rest too after focusing on a task for a long period of time. Taking time to unwind helps relieve stress before it’s too late. The break relaxes the mind and helps in generating the best ideas, the brain becomes more resilient, good for your body as too much stress leads to health problems. There is a list of a number of things that we can do in order to deviate from the stressful state and keep the mind calm such as listening songs, playing games, watching movies, going for outings and much more.

The ability to manage your emotions and remain calm under pressure has a direct link to your performance. The calm mind is the most productive, creative and active. As long as the stress isn’t prolonged, it’s harmless. We should be determined enough to remain calm and isolate ourselves from the states that have a negative influence. It is in our control indeed to make things work if they aren’t happening due to being continuous. If the mind is refreshed from time to time, there won’t be any space for chaos to take place. The above-mentioned tips to keep mind calm and peaceful under pressure are the most effective ones as they resist the generation of stress hormones by deviating us from the conditions responsible for it, make us think about things that are positive and make us learn the value of things that matter to us the most Finally, they help us realize the cause of the stress that is being aroused and help us figure out different ways of getting rid of it.

Image source: www.quora.com

 

 

Life Lessons to Be Learned From Sridevi’s Life

Life Lessons to Be Learned From Sridevi’s Life

Life Lessons To Be Learned From Sridevi's Life

Last updated:6th March, 2018

“Yeh lamhe, yeh pal ham barso yad karenge

 Yeh mausam chale gaye toh ham fariyad karenge”

These are the lyrics from one of the Sridevi’s songs and one of those few songs that have touched me deep inside-I literally grew up listening to this song every time I was at some farewell event. I wanted to write this so much. Honestly, I have been waiting to get into my writer’s groove right after the rays of the sun broke through on my birthday and I woke up to to the news of sudden demise of legendary actress Sridevi. I knew Sridevi only as much as most of you would know her through cinema. Yet the news of her death hit me so hard.

Seldom does life give an answer to the strangest of coincidences that happen? I think of those luminous and gorgeous eyes full of depth, two young daughters left behind and I can’t stop asking myself if this could be for real. The sudden death of the iconic actress triggered a frenzy of grief, disbelief and searching answers. There might be a few who would blame Sridevi for Mona Kapoor’s broken home but then there was something about her that made her life an exception- the reason for which the news of her death provoked a national wave of mourning.

Seeing her giant photograph on the white hearse edged with white flowers, I couldn’t help but think how there are so many invaluable life lessons to be learned from this much-loved actor’s life:

1. Work is Worship

I can never stop admiring this lady of few words who simply let work made all the noise. The reason there was no need for her to resort to smarmy marketing gimmicks was that she had devoted her life to her work. A charismatic lady, she shall always be remembered as a flawless performer who made acting seem effortless. The hard work she put into her work made her grace and gravitas unmatched.

2. Love Thy Family

Actor-MOM-Housewife-Actor Again– This is how Sridevi sums up her life on Twitter. It indeed requires a lot of courage to give up your work- something you’re born for but she gave it up in one stroke and devoted herself to her husband and their daughters. How easily she put her career on hold for her family. Seeing her love for Boney that has never even once let go her limpet grip on his left arm all these years, I don’t want to believe anything else but just that they were meant to be together.

Read Also: What to Do When It’s Not Getting Better

3. We Write Our Own Story

She was not a born superstar or had any such support that would make her journey easier. But she was a self-made success story. Apart from the looks God gave her, she was a legend of her own making by her own efforts and indomitable will-power. During her short lifespan, Sridevi proved that we all are sent here with a purpose and that is to write the story of our own lives. She certainly did it with grace, dignity and love.

Image source: asianage.co

What to Do When It’s Not Getting Better

What to Do When It’s Not Getting Better

Getting Better

Last updated:7th February, 2018

There is something that excites me as I set myself to write this blog post. This comes after talking to a dear friend with whom I have not been able to maintain contact in the recent past. It was only yesterday I found out that she has been dealing with a lot. It seems as if nothing is working out for her. Really?

It’s not just her. I am sure this has happened with each one of you at some point of time in your lives or chances are that it is already happening with you since you’re reading this piece. This is regarding all those times when you do everything to work out things but end up with a feeling that nothing is getting better.

You get stuck in life, love, and relationships. You do things, again and again, wishing that things could simply change your life to become better. This concerns people who desperately want change and are willing to do things/ work towards the change.

However, there is another set of people who want everything to change according to their whims and fancies but they won’t do anything about it. Simply because they are too lazy or they feel things happen automatically in life. Unfortunately, life is not that simple or easy. There is a need to work towards every small thing in life. This even applies to forgetting your ex or someone who left you alone. Or, accepting some sort of failure in life. Everything requires effort. Nothing comes easy in life. Unfortunately, there is nothing much I can do to help them. It’s only they who can help themselves.

Now, if you belong to the former group there’s a lot that can be done to improve your situation. I have been there at your place number of times and I am going to share those things that have helped me come out of those situations where I felt completely helpless.

Firstly, I believe everything is possible. If you set your eyes on something, you can have it. It’s just that sometimes your timing is not right. There is timing for everything and life has its own way of coming back. What you must learn is that the efforts put by you never go waste. So stop worrying about the time you invested in something. Right now, you need to focus on your emotional well being. That is how you feel. This might mean changing the way you had planned things for yourself. Your only goal has to be to maintain positivity in your life.

Relationships

Control Your Emotions

In relationships, this implies controlling your reactions and maintaining your calm in the toughest of situations. Have a belief in yourself and stop paying too much attention to things that can be done or are being done.

Life

Pull Yourself Back

In life generally, for one person it might mean giving up on that dream (for time being as things come back in this universe) and for the other person, it could be changing the entire course of life or simply the way they are working towards the accomplishment of that particular goal/ dream.

You might just be stuck in your path and all that is required from you is some clarity. It’s time to pull yourself back so that you can see what is possible instead of not seeing anything at all. It doesn’t really matter whether your newly set goal is small or big. All it matters is how you feel thinking about your goal.

I have talked about one wrong career decision taken by me 16 years ago in one of my posts. That one decision coupled with several other factors and a series of events that followed my decision had left me completely shattered. I had to settle for something I had never dreamt of. There was a complete emotional breakdown. At that time, I was neither prepared to face any such challenges nor had any sort of guidance to come out of that failure.  The pain was so intense that I can still feel the numbness somewhere in my body while I am writing this post.

Read Also: Life Lessons: Creating a Blueprint for your Life

Sometimes, failures in life teach you a way more than success. Because the pain had crossed its threshold level, one fine day I decided to accept the things as they were. I had become extremely calm and focused on life that existed for me at that moment.  It took me a lot of time but that one failure taught me what it means to live a life with an unaccomplished dream. As a result, I value hard work more than anything else in my life. Furthermore, my own failure (the primary reason of which was no guidance and lack of awareness of career options that existed/ one should opt) made me do extensive research on the career choices. This happened, primarily, due to a reason that although I had accepted the fact that BCA in a local college was something I was supposed to but the desire of doing something big/ better was still alive. All those hours that were spent on researching the available options made me take up the role of a career coach ( even though I am not a certified counselor) later in life besides my other work.  One of the things that indeed give me a lot of satisfaction is helping students accomplish their dreams in whatever way possible.

One Thing at a Time

There is another powerful thing that yields amazing results. Start by doing one thing at a time. This will ensure that hope never dies in your life. Undoubtedly, ‘Hope’ is a big thing. I strongly feel there is no purpose left for a life the moment hope dies. By choosing to do one thing at a time, you maintain your focus in life. When you stay focused and zone in on one thing, you start feeling motivated and determined to take on your life all over again.

Finally, I hope this article was wide enough for everyone to get something out of it. Let me know your thoughts.