There is no right or wrong answer when it comes to determining what you want in a relationship. Everyone has their own set of standards, and that’s fine.
There is no perfect answer when it comes to selecting what you want in a relationship. In a relationship, everyone has various expectations. And no two persons in a relationship are looking for the same things. What we believe we desire can sometimes turn out to be the worst thing for us.
This is why it’s critical to stay focused on your true desires. While physical criteria are crucial, it’s more vital to ask yourself questions about compatibility in relationships, emotional and mental connection, and chemistry.
These are the factors that, more than the physical qualities, define the length of any relationship.
Why is knowing what you want in a relationship so important?
How will you know whether you’ve discovered the proper person if you don’t know what you want? People get into bad partnerships because they are indecisive about their standards. Because a relationship is such an important part of your life, you can’t merely go through the motions of it.
Knowing what you want allows you to pick the individuals you want to spend your time with rather than just offering your heart to everybody who shows interest in you. You can find out what kind of partner you desire for yourself by asking what you want in a relationship.
Anyone who doesn’t come close to meeting this criteria isn’t worth your time, energy, or attention. Knowing what you want also saves you time that you might otherwise waste if you weren’t so clear about your expectations.
What do you want in a relationship | Questions that will provide you with the answers you require
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1. Do you consider a relationship to be a partnership or a sharing of space between two people?
If you want to be involved in every element of your life and your partner doesn’t, it might make you feel lonely, as if the other person is hiding something.
You should consider whether sharing a space is important to you, because if it is, you should be with someone who values it as much as you do. In reality, this could lead to serious problems in the relationship in the future.
2. Do you want to play classic roles?
Women are no longer necessary to stay at home to complete household responsibilities in the twenty-first century. If staying at home is your preference, then go for it!
However, some women aspire to advance in the business world.
If you’re more traditional and he wants you to be the breadwinner, it could be a recipe for disaster. This is why it’s crucial to know what you’re looking for in a relationship from the start.
3. Do you prefer to have your own time?
For some people, time is more important than for others. This could be a problem if you’ve always been independent but your partner isn’t.
In fact, this might serve as the cornerstone for all of your future battles. An independent individual and a dependent person just don’t get along.
4. Do you prefer to keep things separate or do you prefer to share?
It may appear selfish or distant if you wish to keep your money and financial decisions separate yet your significant other is all about merging resources.
If you want the relationship to work out, you need to talk about it or at the very least find a medium ground. Many people feel that relationships should be all about sharing everything, but this isn’t always the case.
5. While being all lovey-dovey is nice at first, are you looking for a PDA-display relationship?
Are you fine with PDA, with the exception of the first few months, or would you rather keep affection for when you’re both alone? Of course, when you first start out, you want to be as close as possible to your destination.
As you become older, you may realise that there is a time and place for PDA. People’s needs for physical intimacy differ, so make sure you and your spouse are on the same page. A person may feel rejected or insulted if this does not happen.
6. Is it relevant how much money they earn?
Money is a bigger factor than you might assume. Are you both cool with the idea of one of you making more money than the other? It’s completely probable that if they make more money than you, you won’t be happy about it, leading to conflicts and possibly a power struggle.
This is why it’s critical to understand what you’re searching for in a partner. If you believe their minimal wage job is merely a stepping stone, but they believe it is their life’s accomplishment, this might be a serious issue.
7. Do you want someone who is reliant on you or who is self-sufficient?
It’s impossible to deny that it feels nice to be needed and wanted. However, some people prefer independent relationships, especially if they are self-sufficient.
Do you want to be the type of couple who makes decisions together and leans on one another, or do you want to be the type who only cares about themselves? In the long run, if you make a decision without asking your partner, you risk offending them if your ideas are diametrically opposed.
8. Will you prefer to make decisions together or on your own?
Some couples, no matter how long they’ve been together, are unable to make mutual decisions. You don’t want to get too far into a relationship before realising you have distinct decision-making styles.
Making big decisions without consulting others can give the impression that you don’t care about their opinions or that you’re on your own.
9. If you have children, who should be the disciplinarian?
Only when one desires to play the role of good cop or bad cop does it function. There could be a power play if you and your partner are both overly strict. You can end up with a house that is out of control if you are both too tolerant.
Also, if one of you has a conventional attitude, it’s possible that you’ll be expected to be the disciplinarian. Make sure you talk about it before starting a family or early on in your relationship.
10. How important is family to you?
If you respect your family, dating someone who holds different ideals would be a nightmare. Remember that when you marry someone, you are also marrying their family. If you don’t have a large family, having family picnics once a month may make you miserable.
Of course, compromise is always an option, but be careful to discuss what you’re looking for in a relationship.
11. Who in the family should wear the pants?
If you are a traditionalist who believes that only one person should be in charge of the ship, finding someone who shares your beliefs is critical. If you’re not careful, there is another factor that can lead to a power struggle.
Expect this to be a problem, especially if you both have dominant personalities. After all, you can’t have two captains unless you agree on it ahead of time.
12. Do you like to save or live in the moment?
If you believe you don’t care about your partner’s spending habits, think again. This is something that a lot of couples quarrel about more than you may imagine, especially if they don’t agree with their partner’s spending habits.
If you’re a saver and your partner is a spender, you’ll make an interesting pair. When you go to fill your gas tank and your significant other has spent the monthly take-home on a Gucci handbag, it becomes a lot more important.
13. Do you want to put money up for retirement or live in the moment?
People who conserve money and those who live in the moment are fundamentally different in many respects. Some people put money aside for retirement, while others say forget it and go with the flow.
Make sure you find someone who is compatible with you in this regard or who is fine with you coming from opposite ends of the spectrum.
14. How long do you wish to spend with each other?
This question about what you want in a relationship isn’t as well-known as those about money, but it’s just as important. If you value quality time but are with someone who does not share your love language or does not provide it, you will experience neglect and resentment.
Make it obvious up front that you want a guy who will give up his frolicking days for you, and look for someone who is prepared to do so.
Do you want someone who believes you’re more attractive than they are?
It’s flattering at first to have someone chasing you around like a puppy and idolising you. People who adore you, on the other hand, may exaggerate your importance while downplaying their own.
This can also suffocate you since they may cling to you and become overly dependent on you, even when it isn’t essential. This is an underappreciated aspect of dating, yet it is just as important.
16. Do you want to play with your friends or go off on your own?
Some couples prefer to play together, while others prefer to meet after the game is over. Before you commit, make sure you know which one you are. This may go unnoticed at first, but it’s a larger deal than you think.
17. Are you seeking for a long-term relationship or just a fun way to pass the time?
Unlike most of the other questions, this is something you should know straight away before investing too much time in someone. They might desire something casual, but you’re looking for a long-term relationship. No, you won’t be able to persuade them to change their beliefs.
People do not change, and if you want something genuine and long-lasting, you must be forthright and honest. If they refuse to commit, you must move forward rather than beating yourself up for not being able to persuade them.
You should ask yourself all the proper questions before you start dating and looking for someone. Otherwise, there will be no way of knowing whether they are good for you or not. We’ll be asking the correct questions about what you’re searching for in a relationship in this feature.